8 more months until I turn 29. Life feels like its hurtling towards a station that is old, fragile, filled with responsibilities and lots of old bones. I don't know if my parents felt this way closing in on their 30s. They had already had my brother and I by their 30s so I guess they wouldn't have even had a chance to take a minute and take it all in. I have some big milestones coming up soon that I am excited, nervous and worried about. I must admit I am more excited than anything else. When you invest so much of your time into your life, work, relationships and then you commit to them even harder, it makes you feel like you have achieved something. I have wholeheartedly, 100% been involved into my life, whether it came to giving love or taking love, giving mercy or getting mercy! The truth and the intensity that you sow into your bonds brings them to a wonderful culmination founded on sweat, grime, tears and love. No one said it would be easy. No one said it would be great but at least I tried and gave it my best.
Arriving at my 29 would mean I arrived there battered, bruised, beaten up yet triumphant. I can recall just how much I used to yearn to be independent, even at a very small age! I wanted to be my own woman, have my own money, house, job, relationships, degrees and things that I achieved on my own! My parents had always given me their tremendous support but that was usually contingent on me not fucking up. And fucking up is what I mostly did. Trial and error and trial and error. Things that I have done, I know for sure none of the folks I know have. And vice versa. Each decision of mine was based on intuition, silliness, high risk taking disposition and a fair amount of unwarranted hubris that comes with young age. And you know what, I am fucking proud of it. I am proud of myself that I spoke up whenever I could, whenever there was a need, always against injustice and always for truth! I hate cowards, I hate people who just go on about their lives (the ones who have decently cushion-y lives and decent cushion-y jobs) and never ever think, talk, see or speak about anything apart from themselves. I have seen and been with those people as well. And I have sent out my hugs and brickbats to all of them whenever there was a need of either.
This is not to forget the best of the best people I have met who have taught me patience, assertiveness, politeness in the face of shit hitting the fan and being yourself, no matter which way the fucking world turns. I am grateful to them for that. I am grateful to my life that helps me meet so many wonderful people that I cry with gratitude sometimes. I just cry that there is so much fucking humanity in this life. Why would anyone be an asshole still? Beats me!
So hey closing in on 29 and then 30 and hitting some great milestones has me dancing like a peacock in the monsoon! And as much as I fear, I am getting older, I am also filled with an abundant joy and excitement. That there is so much more to see in this life. That I get to live some more, see some more, speak out my truth some more and give joy and give back to the world some more!
There is more to come my friend! Hang tight and keep being yourself!
Arriving at my 29 would mean I arrived there battered, bruised, beaten up yet triumphant. I can recall just how much I used to yearn to be independent, even at a very small age! I wanted to be my own woman, have my own money, house, job, relationships, degrees and things that I achieved on my own! My parents had always given me their tremendous support but that was usually contingent on me not fucking up. And fucking up is what I mostly did. Trial and error and trial and error. Things that I have done, I know for sure none of the folks I know have. And vice versa. Each decision of mine was based on intuition, silliness, high risk taking disposition and a fair amount of unwarranted hubris that comes with young age. And you know what, I am fucking proud of it. I am proud of myself that I spoke up whenever I could, whenever there was a need, always against injustice and always for truth! I hate cowards, I hate people who just go on about their lives (the ones who have decently cushion-y lives and decent cushion-y jobs) and never ever think, talk, see or speak about anything apart from themselves. I have seen and been with those people as well. And I have sent out my hugs and brickbats to all of them whenever there was a need of either.
This is not to forget the best of the best people I have met who have taught me patience, assertiveness, politeness in the face of shit hitting the fan and being yourself, no matter which way the fucking world turns. I am grateful to them for that. I am grateful to my life that helps me meet so many wonderful people that I cry with gratitude sometimes. I just cry that there is so much fucking humanity in this life. Why would anyone be an asshole still? Beats me!
So hey closing in on 29 and then 30 and hitting some great milestones has me dancing like a peacock in the monsoon! And as much as I fear, I am getting older, I am also filled with an abundant joy and excitement. That there is so much more to see in this life. That I get to live some more, see some more, speak out my truth some more and give joy and give back to the world some more!
There is more to come my friend! Hang tight and keep being yourself!
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